Lee Laminger Fires Upon F3L Scheduling

- F3L Commissioner Returns Fire In Press Release -

Des Moines, IA - At league headquarters in downtown Des Moines today, F3L commissioner Brian Price was informed of Cleveland Steamers CEO Lee Laminger's comments on the F3L schedule released to the public earlier this morning.

"Mr. Laminger undoubtedly is stressed because his team has to go on the road two weeks straight, but I'm sure we could easily make all of Clevelands' games road games. I'm sure Mr. Laminger would appreciate it if we did." The commissioner said in repsonse to the Cleveland CEO's thoughts on his team's schedule.

"And to respond to Mr. Laminger's comments on the fact he's seen better organized monkey-shit fights than the schedule is." The Commissioner continued, "I believe Mr. Laminger is trying to hint on what half-time shows will be like during Cleveland home games."

And the Commissioner had one more thing to comment, "Mr. Laminger, if you want to smack me up side the head with a pipewrench, I think you'll have to figure out what a pipe-wrench is first, because based on your comments today, I believe you have a minimal knowledge base outside of your swearing and whining."

The Commissioner than announced the press release was over and left to tend to other duties. The Commissioner also hinted that fine of some sort may be given out to Laminger if he continues his outbursts. "We will not have an Al Davis in this league, I will not and can not stand for it." The Commissioner stated in a post-press release interview.

This should produce a very intense match-up when the Commissioners Iowa Mad Cows take on Lamingers Cleveland Steamers in the first week.